*Until it’s time to go for 1000 wins.
Only 25 wins to go before I finally get my golden priest. It feels like I’ve been playing priest for ever and that’s probably because I have; I’ve been playing priest exclusively for so long that space-time has warped around my game screen and no matter what class I pick to play, it’s priest, and versus control decks every game last for about a million years, maybe two, three if we both hit fatigue.
I’ll probably end up going for all 25 wins in one play session, and in that way achieve a kind of brain-fuzz and body odor that only a priest could love. And I mean that in as disgusting a way as you can imagine. Share my suffering. Picture me, bloated, reeking, reeling, shouting at my computer screen at three in the morning. “DAMN IT STOP PLAYING DEVOLVING MISSILES JANA! I WANT TO SEE MY FAMILY AGAIN YOU @#$%^&!
It hasn’t been all bad. You can see in the screenshot below my rank is Gold 2. I’ve been as high as Gold 1. For anyone worth their salt, that’s chump change, but for a metaphor mixer like me, it’s pretty good. Chalk it up to perseverance not being smart enough to know when to stop. And dumb luck. Lots ‘n lots of dumb luck.
Gonna put on some Judas Priest, grab my rosary-fidget-spinner, and move the Keurig over next to my desk. Should be a hoot and a holler. And then, after a nice rest (until, say 2022) I’ll chase golden shaman. Because I hate myself.
